Bill Cosby quotes

Every Closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.

In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.

The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now.

Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet.

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.

I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.

A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.

Gray hair is Gods graffiti.

In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to most fathers and...mothers. Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.

A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.

When you become senile, you won't know it.

All Children Have Brain Damage!

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.

If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.

Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.

Sigmund Freud once said, "What do women want?" The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that.

Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.

When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.